Bob Hunt: Parents best defense against online harassment
Social networking is an amazing phenomenon. I had little interest in it until a few months ago when my sister recommended I join Facebook as a way of staying in touch. Since then, I've reconnected with old friends from high school, and I get a regular glimpse into the lives of friends and family that I don't see every day. It's been great.
My two teenage daughters both have Facebook pages. So far, there have been no problems. But, over the last month, the risks of social networking have been front and center, both in the headlines and, of course, on social networking sites.
Amanda Todd was a 15-year-old British Columbia girl who posted a video on YouTube detailing the bullying she suffered. The video is painful to watch. She doesn't speak, but uses flash cards to tell the story of her manipulation by an adult predator she met via video chat and the resulting abuse she received from teens after the predator posted a topless picture of Amanda on Facebook. Changing schools and even moving to another city didn't help, because the image followed her and the abuse continued. On one of her flash cards, Amanda wrote, "I have nobody. I need someone." She was receiving counseling and placed on anti-depressant medication. Still, feeling desperate, hopeless and alone, Amanda killed herself last Oct. 10. In researching Amanda's story, I came across a seemingly endless number of other stories of teens who had killed themselves, tried to kill themselves, or suffered depression or other horrors because of the cyber or physical bullying they had endured.
According to the Pew Internet & American Life Project, 70% of teens and young adults in the U. S. use social networking sites. Make no mistake about it, there are benefits to social networking for young people, including strengthening social skills, becoming more practiced in digital media (a must in today's economy), and learning that not everyone thinks the way you do about everything. Social networking can be a safe and fun way for teens to keep in touch and express themselves when doing so in person is either impossible or intimidating.
But, there are real risks. Rudeness and meanness have become common for many who are too willing to say online what they wouldn't dare say in person. The potential for creating a false identity or persona makes people feel untouchable in their efforts to manipulate and hurt others. Criminals and predators can exploit the innocence, naivete and fragile self-esteems of teenagers.
So, what's the best defense for kids against the risks of social networking? You already know the answer: parents. Every parent who reads this column and hears the story of Amanda Todd should be talking to their kids today about social networking risks and rules. First and foremost, children should know that their parents will be monitoring their use of the Internet, including social networking sites. They should be told in no uncertain terms that no personal information is to be shared on any social networking site, not their address or school, not their plans for the day or their whereabouts, and not when they're home alone or not home at all. It should be made clear that whatever they post on the Internet is there forever. Those who refuse to abide by these simple measures need to have their access limited or denied. Period.
More information and ideas for parents and teachers can be found at http://www.cybersmartcurriculum.org. This is a matter parents can't afford to ignore, and children shouldn't be left to handle on their own.
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Bob Hunt: Parents best defense against online harassment