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Its hard to say whats a bigger taboo in American politics: being a racist, or calling someone one.

Sure, the Republican Party will occasionally try to distance itself from one of its more egregiously hateful members, like Representative Steve King of Iowa, who lost committee assignments after seeming to defend white nationalism. But mostly, right-wing politicians and their media allies pretend, to the point of farce, that the primary racial injustice in America involves white people unfairly accused of racism. This makes talking openly about the evident racism of our president harder than it should be.

To see how this works in microcosm, consider the House Oversight Committee hearing at which Donald Trumps former consigliere Michael Cohen testified on Wednesday. Cohen said, in his opening statement, that, in addition to being a con man and a cheat, Trump is a racist. This should be clear to all people of good faith, given that Trump was a leading figure in the birther movement, defended white supremacist marchers in Charlottesville, and claimed he couldnt get a fair hearing from a judge of Mexican heritage, to mention just a few examples.

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But Representative Mark Meadows, Republican of North Carolina, strenuously objected to Cohens description, and came up with what he seemed to think was an airtight rejoinder. Meadows, who is white, had Lynne Patton, an African-American woman and longtime Trump employee now at the Department of Housing and Urban Development, stand behind him, and quoted her saying that she would not work for a racist. Checkmate!

In the past, one person who would often publicly vouch for Trumps non-racism was Omarosa Manigault Newman, the Apprentice-star-turned-White House aide. Then Manigault Newman came out with a book calling Trump a racist, a bigot and a misogynist. As part of her promotional tour for that book, she released an audio recording of a conversation she had with Patton and another African-American Trump supporter, Katrina Pierson, strategizing about how to handle the fallout should a tape surface of Trump using a racist slur. On the recording Patton, the person Meadows called upon as a character witness for the president, didnt seem doubtful that Trump could have said such a thing.

Many liberals were agog at this stunt by Meadows; on the left it's largely accepted that responding to charges of racism by pointing to black friends never mind black employees is clueless at best. Some white conservatives, however, seem convinced that you cant be racist if you have an affectionate relationship with a person of color. And so when Representative Rashida Tlaib, Democrat of Michigan, called out Meadows toward the end of the hearing, he was so aggrieved he nearly melted down.

The fact that someone would actually use a prop, a black woman, in this chamber, in this committee, is alone racist in itself, said Tlaib, who is Palestinian-American. Red-faced, indignant and seemingly on the verge of tears, Meadows demanded that Tlaibs words be stricken from the record, turned the charge of racism back on her, and said that he has nieces and nephews who are people of color. In a stunning dramatization of how racial dynamics determine whose emotions are honored, the hearing momentarily came to a halt so that Tlaib could assure Meadows that she didnt mean to call him a racist, and the committee chairman, Elijah Cummings, who is African-American, could comfort him. I could see and feel your pain, Cummings told him.

So Meadows emerged as the victim. There was, however, another twist. It turns out that in 2012, Meadows said some very racist things about Barack Obama, promising, on at least two occasions, to send the American president home to Kenya or wherever it is. As recordings of these comments ricocheted through the news, Meadows didnt quite apologize, but he did tell reporters that his words were not the way that I shouldve answered the questions. (In only one instance did he appear to be responding to a question.) I can tell you that anyone who knows me knows that there is not a racial bone in my body, he added.

I dont know Meadows, or what a racial bone is, but I suspect he may not be the best arbiter of what constitutes bigotry. Then again, when it comes to Trump, no arbiter is really needed. Why, after all, was Meadowss rediscovered birtherism so newsworthy, automatically understood as pertinent to a debate about his racism, or lack thereof? Because theres a mainstream assumption that it is racist to say that Obama secretly hails from Africa. This should, but somehow doesnt, translate into a mainstream assumption that Trump, who rode birther conspiracies to political prominence, is an unrepentant racist. He should be shunned as Steve King is shunned, but he cant be shunned because he is the president.

This contradiction is behind some of the madness of our public life right now. Normalizing Trump, which has become a central mission of the Republican Party, depends on denial about what racism is. Not for the first time, Tlaib got in trouble for pointing out the obvious the president is a bigot, and that in bringing out Patton to exonerate him, Meadows only demonstrated his own gross insensitivity.

On Thursday, Tlaib and Meadows reportedly had a warm conversation on the House floor; according to a CNN reporter, they hugged. Im glad; given how much shes been demonized in her short time in Congress, its probably in her interest to make Meadows feel better about their earlier exchange. Who knows, if shes friendly enough, maybe hell be able to cite their relationship next time hes caught saying something awful.

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