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Posted: May 15, 2017 12:01 AM

Pity the Democrats, to the extent you can without bursting into hysterical laughter at their agony. America has thoroughly rejected them in every branch of the federal government plus out in the states, and on top of that they were utterly humiliated by the guy they all claimed was a complete moron. Which begs the question what does that make the sanctimonious harpy he crushed in the Electoral College?

They still havent realized whats going on. Their ego-driven drive to dominate normal people and shape us into New Socialist Nongendered Beings has blinded them to the bitter reality.

We think they, along with their minions in the media, in Hollywood, and on campus, suck.

They are baffled at our refusal to acknowledge their moral, intellectual, and political superiority. It doesnt just compute.

Yeah, well compute this, geebos.

You look nuts. I mean wacko, zonked out, Hey, that goldfish is firing a mind control laser at my brain and making me break dance nuts.

But dont stop. No, pump it up. Youre at 11, and I say take it to 12.

This is great!

All this insanity is going to help us normals retain power, from your gyno-hat marches to the fake hate crimes to your insistence that the Russians are responsible for everything from Hillary losing the election to the rarely-discussed but well-known liberal epidemic of ED.

Heres a little test. Its been about six months since Trump treated The Smartest Most Accomplished Woman In The World like a NordicTrack treats Harry Reid, and does anyone know even one person who has said, You know, I voted for Trump, but now after Neil Gorsuch, General Mattis and H.R. McMaster, I really wish I had checked the box for Felonia von Pantsuit?

Im not talking about alt-right weirdos they dont count. I mean literally, unless they remove their off-brand Nike knock-offs. I mean normal people. Who voted for Trump and now says something remotely like this?

Yeah, I really regret not letting Hillary pick a SCOTUS judge who thinks the Constitution bans guns but mandates taxpayer-subsidized transsexual abortions!

Wow, that 70% drop in illegal alien entries into America and all those deportations of MS-13 guys are depriving the country of valuable, productive future Democrat voters!

Gosh, I hate so much how Trump has paid attention to that sliver of our country lying between I-5 and I-95!

It was Ashley Judds v-cap slam poetry, combined with Bill Nyes sex confusion clip, that convinced me what America needs is liberals back in power!

No one.

No one who voted for Trump has ever said any of those things. Oh, they might have voted for him reluctantly, but no statistically significant slice of them wish they hadnt.

But the Democrats work under the assumption that such folk exist and are receptive to their tantrums. Good! These liberals are crazy, and theyre stupid, and we totally need to encourage them to keep doing crazy, stupid things.

We conservatives are supposed to be terrified by polls that say that the House could flip to the Dems in 2018. Just ask President Clinton about how the liberal wishcasting multiplier effect on the polls worked for her, but the fact is that we have 18 months to go. On the Democrat side, it looks to be 18 months of kookiness that will leave us normals scratching our heads and snickering.

Yes, I know that just this morning I was saying Comey should have been fired but then Trump actually did it and his doing what I suggested is the worst constitutional crisis ever!

Bombing Putins ally was a cunning ploy to throw us off the trail!

Why, even though failed FBI Director Jim Comey, James MC Leakmaster J Clapper, Diane Crypt-keeping It Real Feinstein, and even noted particle physicist Maxine Waters concede that theres no evidence that Trump and Putin are breeding a collusive love child, Im still convinced of the existence of this sweeping, enormous, and invisible conspiracy that occurred for some reason somehow, and about which absolutely zero evidence of Trump collusion has leaked out during ten months of colonoscopy-esque investigation despite everything else leaking out.

Sounds legit.

Sure, Congress polls right around the popularity of Outhouse scuba diving and Borrowing Charlie Sheens toothbrush, but then who wants to live in a country where we like our politicians? Its not like in 2016 we were high-fiving these guys. We get that a GOP Congress is a necessary evil. But we also get that a Democrat Congress is an unnecessary evil.

And while these liberal spazzes and their fussy Fredocon gimps are shrieking about the coming Armageddon in their high-pitched, girlish voices, Trump is just rolling along. Special prosecutor, schmecial prosecutor hes not falling for it. And did you see the ten judges he just nominated? You usually have to come up with roses and champagne to score like that.

Heres how this goes. The Democrats, along with the media and Team Tinfoil, keep whining about Russians Russians Russians, and normal people keep tuning them out. While theyre babbling about nonsense that means nothing outside of the coastal looney bins, normal people are tuning into how the stock market and the job market just keep getting better, how were not taking guff from foreign creeps anymore, and were not talking about how much taxes will go up but about how much theyll go down.

Tax reform is going to pass. Obamacare is getting repealed its as dead in the Senate as it was in the House, which is not at all. Our military is getting rebuilt. Were going to stop leading with our chin on trade. Things are going to keep getting better, and people will see it.

The only way the President can still screw this up is by choosing to screw this up. He wont do it by messing with liberals. Keep tweeting those twerps into a sputtering rage! It pays dividends every time he provokes them to new heights of lunacy.

No, the President only fails by forgetting his conservative friends, and that is becoming a problem. Where are the hardcore cons at State and Defense? He needs to get solid business leader Anthony Scaramucci into the White House, like we conservatives were promised (A guy who can raise $20 million might come in handy). And as for judges, well, the motto for conservatives is No Justice Willett, No Peace.

The Democrats are being crazy and its a bad look. So lets keep helping them do it. We can pity them even as we laugh at them.

Federal Judges Ask if Travel Ban Is Biased Against Muslims

More here:
Liberals Are An Inferno Of Flaming Crazy And We Should Pour Gasoline On The Fire - Townhall

The newly minted Miss USA ignited a firestorm of liberal outrage Sunday after she gave very non-progressive answers when asked about health care and feminism, specifically declaring health care a privilege and ripping modern feminism.

During the pageants question-and-answer period, 25-year-old Kra McCullough was asked whether she believes health care is a right or a privilege for Americans.

McCullough, who came to the pageant as Miss District of Columbia, stunned much of America, especially liberals, with her answer.

Im definitely going to say its a privilege, McCullough said, explaining that Americans shouldnt be forced by the government to pay for the health care of other Americans.

McCullough, who works as a government scientist for the U.S. Nuclear Regulatory Commission, further explained:

As a government employee, Im granted health care. And I see firsthand that for one, to have health care, you need to have jobs, so therefore we need to continue to cultivate this environment that were given the opportunity to have health care as well as jobs so that (sic) all the American citizens worldwide.

Needless to say, the lefts Twitter reaction to McCulloughs answer was swift:

Others, however, defended McCullough, including one of her fellow competitors, Miss Massachusetts Alissa Musto:

Still, McCulloughs answer on health care wasnt her only remark that outraged liberals. When later asked for her views on feminism and whether she believes shes a feminist, McCullough said she doesnt like the word feminist.

As a woman scientist in the government, Id like to lately transpose the word feminism to equalism, she said.

Heres how people reacted to that answer:

https://twitter.com/Shainaflanagan1/status/863934225606746112

McCullough became the second Miss District of Columbia in a row to win the annual pageant. Deshauna Barber, an Army officer, won in 2016.

Read more from the original source:
Liberals blow a gasket over the stunning answers the new Miss USA gave on health care and feminism - TheBlaze.com

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Conservative v. Liberal: Over the years Conservatives came to be symbolized by the largest, most powerful land animal on earth, the elephant. Liberals are symbolized by the jackass for obvious reasons.

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Warren Christopherson, Springfield 2:23 p.m. CT May 15, 2017

Over the years Conservatives came to be symbolized by the largest, most powerful land animal on earth, the elephant. Liberals are symbolized by the jackass for obvious reasons.

Most college professors, social workers, personal injury attorneys, journalists, film makers in Hollywood, group therapists and community organizers are liberals. Liberals meddled in our national pastime and invented the designated hitter rule because it wasnt fair to make the pitcher also bat.

Conservatives are members of the military, big game hunters, rodeo cowboys, lumberjacks, construction workers, firemen, medical doctors, police officers, engineers, corporate executives, athletes, airline pilots, and generally anyone who works productively. Conservatives who own companies hire other Conservatives who want to work for a living.

Liberals produce little or nothing. They like to govern the producers and decide what to do with the production. Liberals believe Europeans are more enlightened than Americans. That is why most of the liberals remained in Europe when Conservatives were coming to America. They crept in after the Wild West was tamed and created a business of trying to get more for nothing.

Conservatives want to make America Great Again while Liberals want to see America go down the rabbit hole and be more like Europe.

Read or Share this story: http://sgfnow.co/2rj3RdB

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Originally posted here:
The difference between Conservative and Liberal - Springfield News-Leader

Posted May 16, 2017 19:29:05

The WA Liberal Party is operating in a "Matrix-style" alternate reality two months on from its landslide state election loss, the McGowan Government has claimed.

On the first regular parliamentary sitting day since Labor toppled the Barnett government, the new administration accused the Liberals of acting like a "deposed monarchy" and not accepting the March election result.

The attack on the Mike Nahan-led Opposition came as the Liberals sought to blame the new Government for having to urgently seek parliamentary approval to borrow billions of dollars, to ensure expenses could be met beyond July.

Dr Nahan said the new Government had to seek the $11 billion loan to pay for its own promises, a comment which Treasurer Ben Wyatt described as being derived from a "simulated reality".

"You don't get to treat this as some sort of Matrix-style 'I'll swallow the blue pill and wake up in the bed with everything all OK' because unfortunately the $11 billion I'm having to borrow is your spending plan," Mr Wyatt told Parliament.

"You can swallow those blue pills as much as you want but I have got a couple of red ones for you."

Transport Minister Rita Saffioti then picked up the attack, saying the Liberals still had not accepted the March election result and that was why they had refused to move into their opposition offices.

"The Opposition are walking around [like] a deposed monarchy and don't realise they are in opposition," she said.

The new Government has at times goaded the Liberals for sticking with controversial key policies they took to the March election such as the Perth Freight Link and the sale of Western Power claiming it was evidence they had not accepted the result.

The Liberals also came under fire last Thursday after using their first parliamentary question since the election to ask the Premier about a pledge he made five years ago not to take up office in the renovated Department of Premier and Cabinet home at Hale House.

But ahead of today's sitting, senior Liberal MP Dean Nalder defended Dr Nahan's performance and said he had faith in his parliamentary strategy.

"The first day was ceremonial and it was always seen to be a ceremonial day," he said.

"It was felt that some serious questions would get lost and we would wait until the start of parliament proper, which is this week."

The Liberals changed tack in their second Question Time, probing Labor about its investigation into the Barnett government's spending, and asking whether it would also focus on decisions Labor had made in office.

The Liberals have described the $1.5 million commission of inquiry, headed by former Treasury boss John Langolaunt, as a "witch hunt".

Topics: government-and-politics, wa

Excerpt from:
WA Liberals living in 'Matrix-style' reality, refusing to admit defeat, Labor says - ABC Online

Welcome back to Can't Handle the Truth, our Saturday column looking back at the past seven days of fake news and hoaxes that have spread thanks to the internet.

Donald Trump blew off steam Friday morning by doing his version of yoga: rage-filled tweets about the "fake media." As I pointed out last week, "fake media" means any negative press whatsoever (He'd accumulated some negative press during the week). But some of Trump's Friday tweets were right in an odd way: Over the past week a vast liberal fake news machine been churning out bullshit for the #ImWithHer crowd. And liberals have been lapping it up. For the most part, liberal enthusiasm for fake stories manifested itself as a boisterous LOL-fest on social media. But someincluding a Democratic senator's recitation of a talking point from a lefty conspiracy blogwas more consequential than that. Let's take a look:

Massachusetts Senator Ed Markey appeared on CNN Wednesday to talk about James Comey's firing and the need for a special prosecutor. Markey got one part right, about subpoenas being issued to some of Michael Flynn's associates. Thenhaving read something, somewherehe leapt without looking. "A grand jury has been impaneled up in New York," he said, wrongly implying that a prosecutorial body is beginning to build a case.

According to the Boston Herald, Markey had been reading conspiracy blogs, including the entertaining, off-kilter politics blog of former UK politician Louise Mensch and the Palmer Report, which is like a low-budget version of the Drudge Report, but for liberals.

Needless to say, citing these sources on TV is a bad look when you've tweeted about the need for honesty and facts from the Trump administration. If literally anyone gave half a shit about hypocrisy in 2017, Markey could have really gotten into trouble for that one.

On Tuesday night, during the news blitzkrieg that followed the firing of FBI director James Comey, a legitimately funny thing came along for liberals to laugh at: White House Press Secretary Sean Spicer gave a timid press briefing with no bright lights and no video, after concealing himself among the White House bushes (or near the buses, as the Washington Post clarified).

On Thursday, John Cohen, the producer of most of the worst children's movies made in the past ten years, tweeted about that legitimately funny thing. Then he went for seconds, tweeting about Spicer wearing mismatched shoes to work that day. The internet's insatiable mouth cooed, "Yum-yum-yum-yum-yum, I love it!" and Cohen racked up likes and retweets. Thousands of people enjoyed it.

But the tweet was flat-out false. First of all, that photo was from March. But more importantly, it shows Sean Spicer not being stupid, but injured and wearing a foot brace. Cohen has since deleted the tweet.

My colleague Eve Peyser covered this already, but in short, Stephen Colbert said the only thing Trump's mouth was good for was being a "cock holster" for Putin. Then came accusations of homophobia, a hashtag about taking away Colbert's job, the further proliferation of the hashtag by Trump fans, complaints to the FCC, and then, supposedly an FCC investigation.

Publications like Teen Vogue cried censorship. Comedians like Mike Birbiglia and Sarah Silverman ran to their usual corner, penning diatribes about free speech.

But while the FCC was actually looking into the matter, that's only because the FCC looks into every complaint it receives.

The above tweet, from someone named Najahta, embeds a clip from Comedy Central's poorly received The President Show, and features Donald Trump impersonator Tony Atamanuik getting an earful from a child who may or may not be an actor. "You're a disgrace to the world," the precious girl says to the comedian, before taking a phone picture. Somehow, the Comedy Central logo is missing from the video, making it look real. OK, maybe not real, but reality-adjacent.

It's a mystery what motivates people to smash that like button, but in my opinion, 400,000 people don't usually get this excited about a Comedy Central clip. More likely, the clip seemed like a moment liberals were just desperately hungry to seeso very hungry that an implausible facsimile with an audible laugh track was enough to fill the void.

Follow Mike Pearl on Twitter.

See the article here:
Four Fake News Stories Liberals Gobbled Up This Week - VICE